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【忏悔录】求官逐利 让我的人生航船彻底改变了航向

来源: 安徽国资纪检监察网 阅读次数: 发布时间: 2017-02-07

【2016nian12yue23ri,chentongyiyinfanshouhuizui、tanwuzui,beixuanchengshixuanzhouqurenminfayuanyifapanchuyouqituxingsannianliugeyue,bingchufajin30wanyuan。】


wosuofandeyanzhongcuowu,biaomianshangkanqilaihaoxiangshiyouyidingdeouranxing,huoshiyouzheiyangneiyangdekeguanyuanyin,qishineidoushishuoci,zhenzhengdegenyuanhaishiwozishenzhuguandewenti,neiyinshiqijuedingxingzuoyongde,zhongyishangyoujuhuashuodehao,“zhengqicunnei,xiebukegan”。ruguowonengshizhonglaojidangdequanxinquanyiweirenminfuwuzongzhi,shizhongbadangzhangdangguidangjifangzaixinshang,shizhonganzhaoyiminghegegongchandangyuandebiaozhunyaoqiuziji,shizhongshouzhudixianbaochiqingxingdetounao,neimezheixieyanzhongdecuowudoubuhuifasheng。zaizuzhishangbangwozhaowentidezheiduanshijian,woshenkejinxingfansi,yigegecuowudeshishi,yimumubugaifashengdechangjing,zaiwodenaohailifanfuhuifang,huihenhekuijiuwuyiyanbiao。wosuofandeyanzhongcuowu,zhuyaogenyuanyousigefangmian。


(yi)quefadangxingduanlian,wangjiledangdezongzhi。


woshiwuhuzhongyixuexiaozhongzhuanbiye,yikaishifenpeizaijiedaoweishengyuangongzuo,1996nianrudang,1997niandaoweishengjujiguangongzuo,2003nianzoushangkejilingdaogangwei。


gangzoushanglingdaogangweishi,zailangxisuanshibijiaonianqingde,woyecengchouchumanzhi,lizhizuoyige“weimin、wushi、qinglian”dehaoganbu。danjinruguanchangbujiu,wojiuxunsuzhanranshangyixiebuhaodedongxi: gongzuoyingfubiaomian,buzuoshenrusikaomouhua,rezhongjiaopengjieyou,wanxiaoquanzi,xunqiuguanchangbangchentixie,pinfanyingchouwanglai,yihejiuweile,chuxinjilvyuxiangguanlingdaolaguanxi,zuanyingguanweitisheng。neishihouzhixiangchennianqingzhuajinwangshangpa,zaobarudangshiciwangdeganganjingjing,gongchandangyuandeshenfenyishiyijingmohubuqing。tebieshidangshangle“yibashou”yihou,shouzhongziyuangengduole、yingchougengduole、“pengyou”gengduole、xiaoliangengduole,ziwoganjuegengshilianghao。dangshinianqingqisheng,jigongjinli,xiangkuaikuaiganchudianzhengjizibenhaowangshangpa。gongzuotuidongzhongxiguanyongchaochangguishouduan,duishangjibuzhidegongzuorenwugaoyingfuguoguan,zhijiangjieguobujiangguocheng。yixietongshipaimapishuowo“dianziduo、youbenshi、polida”,shenzhiyouxielingdaoyebiaoyangwo“zuofengyinglang、leilifengxing、ganxiangganzuo”。yishijianwanghusuoyi,buzhitiangaodihou,zaishuji、zhenzhang“yijiantiao”zhihou,gengshilaozitianxiadiyile。jiazhangzhidezuofengshiwoshenshangchongmanle“qiangying、manheng、badao、baoli”defeiqi,zijihaideyiderenweizheishiweixingao。dangyuanlingdaoganbudexiuyang、xingxiangdangranwucun,dangdezuzhiyuanze、minzhujizhongzhidouchenglebaishe,shenmeshiwoyigerenshuolesuan,banzichengyuandebiwofengmang、renqitunsheng。


pingshizongshiyigongzuomangweijiekou,burenzhenxuexidangzhangdangguidangji,gengbuyongshuo“neihuayuxin,waihuayuxing”le。canjiaguoshiweidangxiaodezhongqingbantuochanxuexi,beiwodangzuojiaopengjieyoudepingtai,weijianglaiguanchangfazhanzuopudian。zaiyuyixieqiyelaobandejiaowangzhong,xianmutamendeshouru,xianmutamende“ziyou”、xianmutamendeshemifubaideshenghuofangshi。jiuerjiuzhi,chediwangjileweishenmerudang,rudangganshenme,badangguandangchengweizijimouqiushenfen、diwei、jingjiliyidezhuiqiu,buzaiquxiangyigedangyuanlingdaoganbuyinggaizhongshijianxingdangdequanxinquanyiweirenminfuwuzongzhi,liyongzuzhishangfuyudezhiwuhequanliweirenminqunzhongzuohaofuwu。“taifenglailezhudounengfeishangtian”。guanchangshangmeirentixing,shehuishangpengyoudesongyong,xiashudemapi,rangrenzhaobudaofangxiang,xianzaikanlaineixieshijishangdoushi“pengsha”。wofuqinshiyimingyou40niandanglingdelaodangyuan,zhiyoutameimeitixingwo,danwotingbujinqu,juedetadesixiangguoshile,xianzaicaizhidaotaneishidangxingjiandingdebiaoxian。fanleruciyanzhongdecuowu,wojuedezuiduibuqiderenshitalaorenjia。


jiandingdedangxingxiuyang、jianchidangdeyuanze、laojidangdezongzhiyongyuanbuhuiguoshi,zhishikexiwodongdetaichile。


(er)baijinxianglezhuyiyanzhong,diudiaolejiankufendouyouliangchuantongzuofeng。


wochushengzainongcun,xiaoshihoujialihenku,jiashangwomuqinshisubeiyuanjiadaolangxilaide,jingchangzaoshoubierendebishihebaiyan。zheiyangchenglewogupi、guailidehuaixingge,churentoudidesixiangzaiwodeneixingenshendigu,shenkeyingxianglewoyihouderenshengguiji。


gangcanjiagongzuoshigongzihendi,chengjiahoufuqierrennagongziyangyigenver,riziguodejinbaba。zoushanglingdaogangweihou,fangfozaiheianzhongkandaoleshuguang,xinzhongmanshimeihaodechongjing,qidaizhejinyibushengguanfacai。


dangshangxiangzhen“yibashou”hou,xiashubainiandelaile、qiubanshibangmangdelaile、qiyelaobanlaile,meiniandehuiseshourushishenghuoshuipingdafutisheng,dunjueyangmeituqifanshenle,chi、chuan、yong、wanyangyangzhuiqiugaodashang,jiankufendoudeyouliangchuantongzaoyidiuzaiyibian。zaizhaoshangyinziheweiqiyefuwudeguochengzhong,yinweizhiwuguanxijiechulexuduoxingxingsesedelaoban,tamenyouqiuyuwo,jingchangqingwochidacan、hehaojiu、paosangna、waichukaochayouwan,woduitamenzheizhongshemifuxiudeshenghuofangshifeichangxianmu。wojingchangxiang,tamenwenhuabuyidingbiwogao、nenglibuyidingbiwoqiang,dannenghenqingsongdizhengdaodaqian,chihepiaoduhuaqianruliushui,erwozuoweizhenzhangshuji,leideyaosimeiyuegongzizhiyou2000duoyuan,haibugoulaobanmenchiyicanfan,xinlihenbupingheng。


cuowudesixiangdaozhilecuowudexingwei,renweilaobanmenhenrongyizhengdaqian,danyebixuyaokaowomendefuwu,wodefuwuduitamenzhengqianyouhendadegonglao,tamenliyingjiwohuibao,zheishishunlichengzhangde,yeshirenzhichangqing。yikaishishilaobansongwobantuibanjiu,henkuaijiujuedeshouzhitanranle,zaihoulaijiushizhudonganshitixing,huozhegancuishizhijietiyaoqiu,shenzhiduiyixie“biaoxianbuhao”delaobanyi“yanse”,zaigongzuozhongjitaqiyezhaomafan。duixiashudanweidepingjia,qixianshikantamenkaizhangongzuodeshixiao,zhubuyihuaweikantamenduiwode“biaoxian”,zaiganbutibashiyongzhongyigerenguanxihejingjiliyiweiyiju,“tinghuade”zirandedaoguanzhao。


baijinzhuyihexianglezhuyishenshendifushilewodelinghun,shiwowushilaobanmensongqiansongwu、bangwochengdansirenfeiyong,qishizhihaishiliyongwoshouzhongdequanlimouqusili,wanquanwangjilewomendangyizhijianchidejiankufendouyouliangchuantong,jineryibubulunweijinqiandenuli,tuihuaweiyigeweilishitu、jianliwangyidefubaifenzi。


(san)rezhongqiuguanzhuli,pianlirenshenghangxiang。


shenghuoshangdeshemi,deyiyudangguanzhangquan。yaoxiangguogenghaodeshenghuo,jiuyaodanggengdadeguan,gengyoushiquandeguan,zheiyijingchengweiworenshengxintiao。woshenbianderen,qinqi、pengyou、tongxue、laoxiangdouweiraozhewo,tamendouxiwangwoshitushunda,qidaizhekenengdailaidehaochu。zaizheizhongcuowuxintiaodezhiyinxia,wodezhuyaojinglifangzailechuliguanxi、jianliquanzi、toujizuanyingshang,meifengxianliganbubiandongdechakou,qianfangbaijidatingxiaoxi、zoumenlu、jixiangguanlingdaosongli,nulixianglingdaohexinkaojin。2009niandi,xianweidiaozhengwodaoweishengjurenjuzhangzhihou,renweigenxianweishujiguanxichudehao,ziwoganjuechunfengdeyi,zhengzhishangdeyexinxiangtuojiangdeyemakaishixunsubofa,gongzuoshang、shenghuoshangbiaoxiandegengjiarenxingkuangfang。yigaishidiangongzuoshunlituijin、pingwenzhuanguiguodu,xianyiyuandalouqidongjianshe,zhongyiyuanbothezuoxiangmuzhengshishishi,zhaoshangyinzihejihuashengyuzongheguanligongzuonianniannajiang,zheixiegongzuoshoudaoxianweixianzhengfudekending,shuji、xianzhangdahuixiaohuishangjingchangbiaoyang,woyeduocijieshousheng、shi、xiandianshitaicaifang。daozheishi,wodeziwoyishiyijingbaopeng,renweizijinenglichaoqiang、gongzuogandehao,lingdaoshangshiyoukaoshan。daoyixiebumenxiediaogongzuo,huoshixiangfenguanlingdaohuibaogongzuo,jingchangnazhuyaolingdaojiwodezhishilaihehutamen,xianzaixianglaidoujuedehenkexiao。


2010nianxiabannian,wocanjiashiligongxuanfuxianjilingdaoganbukaoshi,yizongfendiyiruweishigongxiaoshefuzhurenzhiwei,zaikaochajieduan,yinweiwozairennanfengzhendangweishujiqijiancengbeijihuashengyu“yipiaofoujue”,zuizhonghualuobiejia。neiduanshijian,wofeichangyumenxiaoji,bunengzhengquerenshiheduidai,meiyoucongzishenzhaowenti,juedezijizaishilihaishimeiyouren,ruguonengzhaodaokekaoderenzaiduohuadianqian,yexujiunenggaochengle。zaijiashangyixielingdao、tongliao、pengyou,shenzhishehuishangderendouweiwojiaoqu,wodeneixinshenchumanmanqilebianhua,juedezuzhishangduiwobugong,guanjiandeshihoumeiyourentiwojianghua,dangguandebudaotiba,buruzhuajinshijianduozhengdianqian。


zhihouyiduanshijian,wojingchangheyixielaobanzaiyiqiwan,nulixunzhaozuoshengyidejihui,zaihexxhunningtugongsilaobandapaishi,dezhitagongsixuyaoshuinigongying,yushiwojiuhewodebiaogexuxxshanglianghehuozuoshuinishengyi(2008nian、2009nianwocenghexuhehuokaiguofandian,zhengledianqian),shuinishengyishi2011nianchudao2011niandiqijianzuode,zheigeqingkuangwoyizhimeiyouxiangzuzhibaogao。zhongyiyuanxiangmujiansheqidonghou,woweilededaohaochufei,xiangzhongyiyuanyuanzhangzhangxxdazhaohubaqianqichangdipingzhenggongchengjiaojixuxxzuo,shoushouxujidehaochufei16wanyuan。zhihouyoudazhaohubazhongyiyuanjianshegongchengzhongdehunningtuyewujiaojimougongsizuo,shouqule10.5wanyuandeyewujieshaofei。zheixiedoushishishizaizaidequanqianjiaoyi。


zhici,woderenshenghangchuanchedigaibianlemubiao,yanzhongpianlilezhengquedehangxiang,wozaiminglideyuhaishangyuezouyueyuan,tashangleyitiaobuguilu。


(si)wanggudangdejilv,zhishifubaiduliukuosan。


wosuofandeyanzhongcuowu,guigenjiedihaishiwosangshiledangxingyuanze,wanggudangdejilv,fangsongleduizijideyaoqiu,meiyouzhulaosixiangdefangxian,meiyoushouzhuyigegongchandangyuandecaoshoudixian,zhidaoyibuyibuhuaxiangshenyuanerbunengziba。


xiashudanweiheqiyejiwobainian,yikaishishisongyanjiu,jiershigouwuka,zaizezhijiesongxianjin,zhidaohoulaiwozhudongtixinganshi,shenzhiyaoxiashudanweizhijienaqianjiwoyongyugerenyulingdaolianluoganqing。woxihuankaiche,yikaishishisijiagongche,ouerjieyongqiyecheliang,wangshangluntanyourenfanying,wobudanbugaizheng,erqiexiangbanfazhangqizhanyongqiyedecheliang,zuihouhaishijuedebuguoyin,gancuirangzhongyiyuanhezuoxiangmutouzirenyangxxzhijiegoumaixinchesongjiwoshiyong。jingshangyeshizheiyang,xianshihehuokaicaiguan,jierxiangzhengdaqianzuoshuinishengyi,zaihoulaijiuyanbianchengliyongzhiwubianlijieshaogongcheng,buxuyaorenhechengbentouru,zhijiegaoquanqianjiaoyi,laoquhaochufeiheyewujieshaoticheng。shenghuozuofengshang,yikaishishixianmuqiyelaobandehuatianjiudi,ranhoujiushipinfanyuyixieshehuishangdenvxingjiechu,hejiushanggeting。


wodezheixiewentidoushiyouyigecongbeidongdaozhudong、congxiaodaoda、congliangbiandaozhibiandefazhanguocheng,ruguowonenggoushishiyidangzhangdangguidangjiguanzhuziji,jizaorenshidaocuowu,xuanyalemajishigaizheng,jiugenbenbuhuifazhandaojintianrucidedibu。“yaoxiangrenbuzhi,chufeijimowei”。yijianjianweijideshishi,shenbianzhouweiderendoukandeqingqingchuchu,zhishiwozhuguanzifu、piqibaozao、shaqitaizhong,meiyourenganshuo,jishiyourenganshuo,woyetingbujinqu。


pingshirezhongyuqiuguanqiucai、rezhongyutongqiyelaobanchengxiongdaodi、rezhongyuwanxiaoquanzi、rezhongyuxiangshoufuxiushenghuofangshichihewanle,genbenmeiyourenzhenxuexidangzhangdangguidangji,shangjiyouyaoqiuzhishiyingfuxingdizouguochang,youshilianxuexibijidoushimishudailaode。haiyouyigejiqiyanzhongdecuowurenshi,jiushijingchangzaimeitishangkandaochachudefubaifenzi,anzhidajibaiwan、shangqianwan,bujinbuyicijingxing,fanerduizhaozijisuozuosuowei,juedezijihaisuan“qinglian”de,zijishenshangneidian“xiaoshi”genbenbusuanwenti。conglaibuqugenshenbianyixieqinmianjingye、gongdaozhengpai、wushiqingliandehaoganbubi,shenzhibeidilichaoxiaotamenshishaguanongbao。fanguolaizongshiyuneixieluziye、“youbenshi”deganbupanbi,juedezijihaiyouxuduodifangyaoxiangtamenxuexi,zijizuodeneidianshizhishixiaoerke。zhengshizheizhongjiqicuowuderenshi,bianchenglecuihuaji,jiasulewodefuhuaduoluo、tuihuabianzhi,xunsuhuaxiangheiedeshenyuan。


meiyoujianchidangxingyuanze,meiyoulaojidangdejilv,gongzuoheshenghuozhongmeiyoubawozhubianjiehedixian,shiwoxiangyigechedishiqumianyilidebingren,yidanganranfubaibingdu,bianxunsuehua,manyankuosandaoquanshen,zhizhiweijishengming。


wosuofandeyanzhongcuowujiaoxunshifencantong,huihen、kuijiudouweishiyiwan,gengbunengyuantianyouren,wojiangchengkenjieshouzuzhishangjiangduiwodeyansuchuli,conglinghunshenchuzhongsuziwo、gaiguozixin、zhongxinzuoren。


(摘自安徽纪检监察网)